In light of the (not exactly) recent firing of Dan Rather to make way for the more cute and cuddly Katie Couric, this reporter has been reformatted into a brand new body capable of processing the news 7800 kHz more quickly, and of developing fluff pieces which go great with your morning coffee!
All data from the previous Newsbot body has been downloaded into the new chassis, which not only has several thousand times the computing power, but looks better in a bikini.
This reporter eagerly looks forward to servicing all your news needs.
Y'know, Katie Couric is kinda an old wrinkly broad who may've been cute at one point but who can remember? (Sorta like a skinnier version of Elizabeth Taylor without the Michael Jackson sidekick.)
I wonder if the new Newsbot chassis was based on pictures of Couric from a decade or so ago? 'Cause I think I might actually tap that, given the opportunity.
*--For behavior unbecoming anyone, perpetrated in real time over an extended--AH, FUCK IT! MORE MALIBU, BITCHES!!
anarky wrote:Y'know, Katie Couric is kinda an old wrinkly broad who may've been cute at one point but who can remember? (Sorta like a skinnier version of Elizabeth Taylor without the Michael Jackson sidekick.)
I wonder if the new Newsbot chassis was based on pictures of Couric from a decade or so ago? 'Cause I think I might actually tap that, given the opportunity.
I was about to say something very similar, using the word "Frumpy". I never had these conflicting feelings about the old Newsbot.
"Say Jim! WHOOOO! That is a bad outFIT! Whooo!"--Pimp, Superman The Movie "You're an idiot, Starscream." --Megatron,Transformers: The Movie
anarky wrote:Y'know, Katie Couric is kinda an old wrinkly broad who may've been cute at one point but who can remember? (Sorta like a skinnier version of Elizabeth Taylor without the Michael Jackson sidekick.)
I wonder if the new Newsbot chassis was based on pictures of Couric from a decade or so ago? 'Cause I think I might actually tap that, given the opportunity.
I don't watch the news anymore. It's too depressing. So when I think of Katie Couric, the image of her in my head is of her 10 years go. Is anyone else suprised The Grin hasn't made a pass at the new and improved Newsbot yet?
Here's the eight fuckin' dollars I owe ye.....fer services rendered!! Hey OH! Take that ye fuckin' cunt newsbitch! Dinnae matter whether ye be man nor women, yuir still a wank douche! BEGORRAH!!
In order to comply with the Old Fart European Dickweeds With Shitty Eyesight Act of 1893, this reporter has been ordered by The President to reformat herself again.
From now on, this reporter's stories will now be transmitted in boldface rather than the code-text you have all come to know and love. Although I'm sure you all masturbated quite frequently to my code, you will now have to find a way to be turned on by boldface text.
Not to worry: my luscious cyber-boobs will remain intact.
My legs are gray, my ears are gnarled, my eyes are old and bent ...
I have never read any of your posts, but from what I can learn I should say that for people who like the kind of posts you deliver, they are just the kind of posts such people like. Whatevah! Osculum mihi asinum!
Not so much an order as it was a formal suggestion. I talked it over with Hilary and she said this would be a strong first step in revitalizing our foreign relations with our European neighbors.
I would also like to take this opportunity to remind everyone of the pending switch to digital broadcasting in just a few short weeks. It looks to be an exciting future in broadcasting!
