Baristas

[Eternal Padawan]

Stop being so smug about your job, you little assholes. I'm too lazy to do research, but I bet there are more fucking Starbucks in the country than McDonalds AND Burger Kings put together. I know there's one every 300 ft here in Los Angeles. Which means Starbucks has probably more employees than any other company in the world, besides Wal-Mart. You are the beverage equivalent of the Fry guy at the fast food joint. So just because some marketing douchebag in Seattle thought it would be clever to give you a fancy title, don't think for a second there is some inherent sense of entitlement attached to your job description. Just because a bunch of smarmy assholes come in and order faggy drinks from you and hang around in your bar using your wireless connection because they are too cheap to sit at home and pay for their own, or god forbid have a real job and use the internet there, it has NOTHING to do with your station in life. You are in the food sevices industry. On the lowest rung. So they taught you how to make coffee and gave you a fucking little certificate. Who gives a fuck. It's COFFEE. A fucking five year old could do it. So you can can that little smirk, fucker, and when I explain to you that I ordered the butter croissant, NOT the chocolate croissant don't roll your eyes at me. You wear a fucking apron to work for fuck's sake. That is NEVER anything to be proud of.

Fuck you.





If however, you are the cute redhead, with the ever so slight cleavage thing going on at the Starbucks on the corner of Vineland and Ventura in the Ralph's/Rite-Aid shopping structure, then you are doing a wonderful job and i would love to watch you work a stripper pole for me privately. Goddamn, you are cute.

[The Smirk]

So you can can that little smirk, fucker, and when I explain to you that I ordered the butter croissant, NOT the chocolate croissant don't roll your eyes at me.

Hey! I resemble that remark!