the vynsane asylum

<font face="Book Antiqua"><b><font color="orange"><font size="4">jjreason not been here lately. Me Grimlock know this because he fleshling, fall and break foot. Me Grimlock big tough Autobot, not break foot so easily. jjreason cry like little girl, ask wife to bring him ice cream while he cry and not come here. He ask me Grimlock to tell other fleshlings here, elicit sympathy so maybe they send him ice cream, too. jjreason is sucker for ice cream. Especially spumoni. Me Grimlock not see appeal of spumoni. Grimlock say buy one type of ice cream, dammit. Maybe when silly foot heal, he come back. Maybe. Me Grimlock not sure.</font id="size4"></font id="orange"></b></font id="Book Antiqua">

what, does he type with his toes???

"oh, my foot hurts... i can't possibly use the digits at the opposite end of my body to communicate over the internet..."

just kidding jjr!

[se]

What was he. kicking some sorry group of neighborhood kid's ass at Trac-ball???
Or did he just accidentally break it off in someones ass???
Either way, DAMN broken stuff is no fun Bro, especially when ya got moving parts in there- plenty of ice and rest, and watch the hottest porn you can find to keep good circulation to the injured limb

Well - good news (now that I've managed to limp back over here). I saw the doctor, and luckily enough it wasn't broken. Turns out I had a really, really bad ingrown hair on the top of my foot - which was weird, because there was no swelling, redness or iritation from wearing my flipflops - but true. It hurt so badly, I honestly thought it was broken. The doctor, once he wiped the shit-eating grin off his face, told me I needed to "Suck it up, Princess" and that I had an "exceptionally low" tolerance for pain.

He also told me to consider "regular exercise", which was a real revelation - I had always thought I was going to be the next cover model for Men's Health.

All and all though - any day at the doctor with no fingers in your ass is a great day indeed!

<blockquote id="quote"><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" id="quote">quote:<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"><i>Originally posted by jjreason</i>
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He also told me to consider "regular exercise"
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What the fuck is that[???] It must be one of those fancy medicines they have commercials for on TV.

Just tazer the fuckin toe. That will stop any hair from growing.

Okay.... I was gonna call ya yesterday to see how you were doing, JJ, and now I am glad that I didn't, mostly for your sake

I have NEVER heard such a tale, honestly, that is one hell of a thing, but at leasat the doctor tried his absolute best to not actually crack up right the in the office- was he taking shots of straight oxygen between phrases or what???

And either way, I hope you're over it quick, I have had some ingrown hairs that hurt a good bit but it sounds like you got the King of all of them

god thing it wasn't in your [beard]

Yeah, or in my (*)

This really sucks ass JJ. What were you doing that caused it to get ingrown? Shaving your damn toes?

oh. my. god.

i can't believe it actually hurt that much... nor can i believe that you would own up to that, even in the relative anonymity of an internet chat board...

how long is this in-grown hair? like, 7 inches or something?

No, it was seriously just barely under the skin. I really don't know what was going on. I had this brown spot on my cheek I wanted him to check too, for skin cancer or something...... the fucker, he <i> licked his fucking finger</i> and wiped my face to see if it would come off! What did he think it was, a fucking chocolate chip or something??? Give me a break.

that's awesome...

I guess I didn't know that ingrown hairs could be such serious business. I always figured they were just a minor problem. Furthermore (biggest word ever used on this site), I never think of them as being anywhere but on people's faces/necks.

Also, I always thought dogs laid eggs. I learned something today.

<blockquote id="quote"><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" id="quote">quote:<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"><i>Originally posted by CaptainSolo1138</i>
<br />Furthermore (biggest word ever used on this site)
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i dunno about that... have you read any of bizarro snigtad flornbi's diatribes?

Oh, and I forgot the REALLY bizarre part! I had to provide a stool sample (I think firearms guys have to do that because lead shows up in your stool) - and the doctor had a look, took the lid off AND FUCKING SNIFFED THE SAMPLE, RIGHT THERE IN THE OFFICE!!!! Can you fucking believe this guy??????