Apparently the word "hot" does not mean "extremely attractive" anymore, since Lindsey Lohan is the "hottest" girl in the world. Is "hot" new slang for "disease laden coke whore"?
Check out the rest of the list here and see who she's "hotter" than. If you're anything like me, you'll be pissed by about the 1/4 point of the list. Also, you'll see some names that you haven't heard in a while, making me wonder how much it would cost for a publicist to get me on the list.
BTW, you did not read the list wrong: They do indeed have Haylie "I wish I was one tenth as hot as the sister I pretend to be" Duff ranked above Isla Fischer. And Salma Hayek. And Kelly Carlson.
Actually, I saw Kelly Ripa in a bikini on some magazine once, not realizing who she was. She didn't look that bad. Not good enough for the top 50, but she could be in the later half of the top 100.
Between stuff like this and VH-1s music lists, its about time we make a list of reasons why lists by magazines and TV shows suck.
1. Lindsay Lohan: Fug whore who doesn't even belong on this list.
2. Jessica Alba: Hot, #2 suits her
3. Scarlett Johansson: Should be #1. Hot and relatively classy.
4. Christina Aguilera: No way she should be top 5.
5. Jessica Biel: Here's the thing about Jessica Biel: She's an acquired taste. I don't think everyone looks at her and says "HOT!" like they do with ScarJo. I'd put her top 3, but I think the general public would leave her out of the top 10.
6. Ali Larter: Hot, #6 is a good place for her.
7. Eva Mendez: Whatever. I think she's average.
8. Rihanna: Meh. I really don't care.
9. Eva Longoria: Midgets have no place on lists of hot people.
10. Fergie: No way. Fuggie is a disgusting human being and horrifying to look at. Every time I see her I'm reminded of how Howard Carter must've felt when he peeked inside of King Tut's sarcophagus for the first time.
11. Sienna Miller: OK looking; Not relevant enough and won't be on it next year though. She's only famous for fucking a famous person.
12. Angelina Jolie: Overrated IMO, but should be in the top 10.
13. Beyonce Knowles: Who doesn't love weaves and bitch-staches?:roll:
14. Katherine Heigl: "She's popular. Let's make sure she's in the top 15."
15. Avril Lavigne: Horse shit
16. Ashlee Simpson: No talent horse shit
17. Maria Sharapova: Hottest current athlete now that Kim Clijsters has retired (Yes, I said it. Kim Clijsters is the best looking Belgian chick I've ever seen).
18. Megan Fox: Who?
19. Cameron Diaz: Who doesn't love ridiculously disproportioned feet? She looks like a goddamn clown.
20. Keira Knightley: Where to begin? How people like Beyonce, Ashley and FERGIE are considered "hotter" than her by anyone is a crime.
Beyonce is so overrated in terms of looks and talent, it's not funny.
Eva Longoria looks like some sort of love child between Igor and the rancor.
My brother will agree with Avril; lord knows he has enough faked pictures of her nude on his computer.
Cameron Diaz has some sort of weird wasting disease. She started out in The Mask, where she easily is one of the hottest women of all time. But then her looks began to rapidly decay. Even putting aside the fact that she's swallowed Justin Timberlake's rotten semen, she's so incredibly fugly right now that a bag over her head wouldn't suffice.
Ashlee Simpson should have totally been forgotten after the SNL lip-synch incident. Why did that sort of thing kill Milli Vanilli's career, and she's still going strong? She should disappear, and take her equally no-talent bimbo sister with her.
*--For behavior unbecoming anyone, perpetrated in real time over an extended--AH, FUCK IT! MORE MALIBU, BITCHES!!
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